Day 274: What Is Your Love Language?

When you are genuinely interested in someone, it would be wise to stay curious. Get to know them. And I don’t mean the “What’s your favorite colour?” kind of curiosity, although there’s nothing wrong with knowing that either.  What I mean is get to know who they are – their needs, their personality, how they think, how they express and communicate love, etc. I mean, if you want in for the long-haul, it might be a good idea to know what makes their motor run don’t you think?

We’ve all heard it before – communication is key. It really is. And now that I am in the beginning phase of a relationship again, I am just starting to grasp what exactly that means. It’s about understanding. Not sure what I mean? Let me share with you.

You see, I just discovered that Mr. Elevator and I have different love languages, which means we express and receive love differently. How I express it to him and how I want to receive it back are different than how he expresses it and how he needs to receive it back. Why is this important? Well, have you ever tried filling a diesel tank with gas instead? (I have. Oops!) The vehicle won’t go very far will it! Even though both diesel and gas are types of fuel, one is a better fit for that particular engine and is what fuels the car to go forward. Same thing applies for relationships. Filling the other person’s “love tank” with the correct fuel will make it go the distance; however, fill it with the wrong one and you are destined to go to the repair shop. Catch my drift?

So what are these love languages I speak of? Check out the book “The Five Love Languages” by Gary Chapman. I read it five years ago, and I am re-reading it again. In a nutshell, the five love languages are this:

1.       Words of Affirmation

2.       Quality Time

3.       Receiving Gifts

4.       Acts of Service

5.       Physical Touch

Before you go trying to figure out the other person though, I suggest figuring out what yours are first. Get to know thy self. Do you know what your love language is? Not sure? Here’s a hint: it’s usually the one(s) you do the most. Mine are words of affirmation, quality time, and physical touch…probably in that order too. What are yours?

If you’re in a relationship, but not feeling “full” then chances are you are simply communicating differently. First, get curious as to what makes the other person feel appreciated and do more of that. Second, they are not mind readers. Tell them what you want. Chances are, if they truly care, that they will want you to feel good too.

Seek first to understand…then to be understood.

Day 273: Follow The Signs

Exactly a month has passed since my last update, and since then I had decided that enough was enough already. I completed my one year manbatical on October 28^th and started seeing Mr. Elevator. I am not saying he’s Mr. Right or anything; however when all the arrows are clearly pointing in one direction, sometimes you just gotta follow the signs and trust wherever it is going to lead. In my case, these signs were clearly marked, in my face, and hard to miss. Everything within told me it would be an opportunity I would regret taking if I didn’t, so I went with it. It reminds me of a story I was told once that goes something like this:

There was a man who escaped a shipwreck and clung to a piece of driftwood for his dear life. He called out to God and prayed, “God, please save me.” That day a fisherman in a small boat comes by and asks if he needs help. The man on the driftwood said, “No thank you. God will save me.” So the fisherman keeps going.

The second day the man again pleads to God and prays, “God, please save me!” That day a cruise ship comes by and the captain asks if he needs help. The man again declined saying, “No thank you. God will save me.”

On the third day, the man now frozen, tired and hungry again cries out, “God, please save me!” That day a helicopter flew by and the pilot asked if the man would like some help. Again the man declined. That night the man drowned.

When he got to heaven the man asked, “God why didn’t you help me? Three times I prayed to you for help?”

To which God replied, “I sent you a fisherman, a captain and a pilot…what more do you want?”

So the long and short of it is: I wasn’t about to let another opportunity slip by because it didn’t follow my plan as I thought it should look on MY timeline. No. I asked… I received… and this time I chose to hop in the boat. Plain and simple.

I still can’t even explain what happened. I literally felt magnetized by this guy when I met him like I HAD to know him, although I am still not sure why. And just so you know, that’s NEVER happened to me before. Have you ever experienced such a thing? I’ve been told that it is called “harmonic resonance”, where like attracts like. You know, like when you are in a room full of people and the ONE person you happen to talk to that evening does, did, or experienced the same thing as you…and you have that “Really? Me too!” moment. Except that I haven’t discovered that part yet.

 So I find myself approaching this relationship very differently this time around …from a place of curiosity; like a piece of a puzzle and I am trying to figure out where it fits.  I am not sure what it is I am about to learn from it yet, but rest assured I will be learning something. There is, after all, a rhyme and reason for everything in life.

At least that is what I believe. How about you?

Day 242: Crossroads…Should I or Shouldn’t I?

I hate to sound like a drama queen (and God only knows how much I hate drama!), but I have a bit of a personal dilemma. Wait a minute…hold that thought…how personal can it really be if I have been telling you guys everything for the past eight months anyway, eh?

Riiiiight.

Ok, so here’s the scoop.

Technically I will have been single for one year in 15 days from now, unless I counted wrong. October 29^th would have been Day One. Yes, that’s right…I started this journey a few months BEFORE my “official” start date of February 14^th. My original blog start date was supposed to be much earlier, however I was waiting for a “significant” date to start it on. You know, trying to make it perfect. It’s ok if you eyeball roll at that, I did. That’s who I was at the time though. I know better now though, I feel like I have grown since then. At least I hope I have. Since I started I have changed the way I see and treat myself, how I eat, how I drink, how I sleep, manage my thoughts better, manage my finances and career better, have healthier relationships with people, attract a different quality of guy, etc. None of these are radical changes or anything, but significant enough for me to notice and see the difference. In my eyes, I am already successful at what I set out to achieve. None of it is perfect by any means, and I am WAAAAYYYYY far off from my original goals, however I also realize that my goals were a bit unrealistic.

Ok, a LOT unrealistic.

I have carved out a path though, and I feel like I am well on my way to achieving everything that I set out to do. It’s going to require more than just a year though. I have a feeling this is a lifelong journey, and this one year was something to set me off in the right direction.

So here’s the dilemma I face: Do I end my one year “manbatical” in 15 days…or do I wait until February 14^th, 2012? I am kind of torn. What are your thoughts?

Either way, I will still blog about my journey regardless…but I sure would love your feedback.

…And just cause I know you’re probably already thinking it…no, this has nothing to do with Mr. Elevator. I have been thinking about this long long before that.

Day 224: I Have Something to Tell You

Right from the get-go I said I would always be honest with you. Honesty, after all, is what trust is built upon…and trust in my opinion is something to be earned. So for the sake of my own integrity to me, to you, and the intention behind this blog, I have to tell you something:

I met someone recently…in the elevator…in my OWN building of all places.

And I have to tell you, I nearly broke my manbatical promise. Well technically I broke my zero contact rule because I kissed him…once…but I didn’t full out break ALL of it. So I feel it is still salvageable, or at least that’s how I am rationalizing it. LOL  

Take it from me though, it was a serious lesson learned. I actually still feel a bit guilty. But it was not necessarily because I cracked in a moment of weakness; it is because I actually felt like I was cheating on my own self by breaking my own word. Today I learned the importance of keeping my word. And you know what else I learned? The worst kind of broken promise is the one you don’t keep to you.

So after much contemplation and a few conversations with people I trust (both friends and family), who are also totally supportive of my year-long manbatical (both of which are guys by the way!)…I did what was the hardest for me to do, what I feared the most, yet what I know in my heart was right. I had to be completely honest and tell Mr. Elevator Man that even though I like him and would like to get to know him better I can’t date, I can’t make out, I can’t do ANYTHING but just hangout for the next 4 ½ months.

Doing what is right is not always the easiest road to take, but it sure shows character. And to me, developing good character is more important than immediate gratification. I certainly feared that Mr. Elevator Man would think I was nuts and go away, but you know what? He didn’t. He actually respected my decision and asked if I liked hockey and want to watch with him sometime instead. How’s that for blowing old belief systems out the window eh? Here I am doing something I have never done before, and out comes a changed reality I have never had before. For those who don’t believe you can have your cake and eat it too…I beg to differ. Yes you can.

Do one thing a day that scares you? Check! And you know…when you get the mind out of the way, all things are possible. I dare you to try it.

Day 221: If You Are Not Doing This One Thing…You Are Insane

As you can see, I have switched to writing once a week now so that I can have more time to achieve the goals that I had originally set out to do…health, wealth, and relationships. When I started this project, I kind of jumped in with both feet very blindly and didn’t anticipate how much time and energy it would take. Not that I mind at all, I absolutely LOVE writing and I enjoy the fact that it has connected me with all of you out there in ways I never imagined…and I want to be doing a LOT more of it. HOWEVER, I had to take a look at my list of priorities and re-evaluate.

How do I do that? Test and measure. Is what I am doing now accomplishing what I set out to do? Is it taking me closer to or further from my original intention? The answer, at least for the time being, was further from. I spent more time writing than doing. So now I am doing the opposite. After all, my intention is to affect and inspire change through ACTION, not just write about it. Anyone can do that. It was an important and very valuable lesson I learned recently from a very smart business coach. Sounds like an obvious one, but it surprises me how few of us actually do it. Including me.

Without test and measure, you may as well call me insane because I would be expecting different results while doing the same darn thing. I’ve done that for such a long time already, and my life is a reflection of that. A little out of control. I am ready to move on and MAKE something different for myself. Notice I said MAKE.

Now the big question is…

…What would you like to MAKE for yourself?

Day 213: Are You Committed or Merely Interested?

In case you don't know, have a fear of heights. And a few years back I wanted to get over that fear, so I did what only seemed logical…I went skydiving while in Mexico. I found the nearest skydiving facility, paid my fee, and went up in the plane. That was the easy part. I did what’s called a tandem jump, which means I was strapped to the instructor. And thankfully so, because I screamed like a sissy girl on the way down and forgot that there was even a ripcord to pull. HA! Yeah, I am probably not the buddy you want when faced with a life-threatening event.

But even before that, before the jump, while I was still IN the plane I was thinking “Oh, this is going to be a piece of cake!” Boy was I wrong. I was doomed as soon as they opened the side door and I looked down.

Fear seized me and all I heard in my head was, “WHAT WAS I THINKING!?” Why would I voluntarily CHOOSE to hurtle myself out of a perfectly good plane and purposely fall to a possible impending doom? Surely I must be crazy. With a little coaxing though I was convinced to slowly crawl to the edge and step outside on the foot holding. I remember holding on for dear life saying “Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!” And it was at that moment I had to decide…was I committed or was I just merely interested?

The Jump.

Now I have to admit, had I not been strapped to someone who was already committed to seeing me succeed I might have wimped out and said, “Wow, nice view!” and then crawled my sissy butt back into the plane. But no such luck. After I got coached and reminded of my “why” I wanted to jump, I shifted from the mentality of being just merely interested to fully committed… and I jumped. And let me tell you, once you commit to jumping, it’s not like you can exactly change your mind mid air. Well, I guess technically you can, but it is not going to help. There is no rewind button.

So why bring up the topic of “committed” versus “interested”?  Because it makes all the difference when wanting to accomplish a goal. Since the seminar, I have been forced to look over what it is I SAY I want for myself and what I have actually been DOING. You know what I found out? I haven’t been as committed as I thought I was on a lot of things; I’ve been merely interested. How do I know? Results. There is a different level of passion between commitment and interest, and it’s that level of passion that is the driving force between the dreaming and the having. Guess it is time for me to get back to the drawing board and get clear on what it is I REALLY want.

In the meantime I will be changing the format of this blog a little. Not majorly, just a little. What does this mean? I’ll still be writing but not every day as I had been. I AM still committed to writing; however, I am more committed to my health and wellbeing...and right now they are both battling for my time.

With that said…what are you saying you are committed to? Are you really?

Mission Accomplished!

Day 211: The Experiment

This past weekend I learned a LOT. One of the things I learned about was the power of words and their effect on our mind, our body, and our wellbeing on all levels. And it wasn’t “woo woo” talk either. There was actual scientific proof to back it up. Definitely not “woo”. Not that it really matters, as there are MANY things that occur that cannot be explained at this moment in time, but if you are like me…the scientific proof helps.

One of the things I learned, or rather re-learned, was something I first saw in the documentary “What the Bleep Do We Know”. It was about the impact of positive words versus negative words on water as described by Dr. Emoto; a theory I was introduced to nearly 10 years ago but only understood two days ago. If you don’t know what I am talking about, check out this video:

So I decided to get curious and test it for myself.

As you know (if you have been following since Day 1), I have an alkaline water machine. It works and I absolutely love it.  Today though, I wanted to try something different and wanted to if words really would impact my water. So I wrote “Love & Gratitude” on the bottom of my glass container and left it there for an hour. When I returned, this is what I saw:

Cool eh? Just think…if words have this much impact on my glass of water, then imagine the impact it has on us when our own bodies are made up of around 70% water. Makes you want to watch what you think about and say now doesn’t it?

Day 210: Have You Had Your Mind Blown Lately?

This past weekend was not your average weekend. At least for me it wasn’t.

I was invited to attend a personal/professional development workshop by a friend of a friend, and although I wasn’t really sure what to expect there I was at least wise enough to go with an open mind. What I didn’t realize was that I was about to have my mind blown. KER-POW!

The workshop I attended was called “Claim Your Competitive Edge” by Dov Baron. If you haven’t heard of it before, I highly suggest checking it out. If you have heard of it but haven’t gone yet, don’t wait…go. You won’t come out the same. I can promise you that.

I learned a LOT of things in the three-day intensive and experienced “AH HA!” after “AH HA!” I grew and expanded…and I don’t mean because I ate too many Tim Bits either. I mean my mind got stretched and I got IT…I REALLY got IT.

So here I am. And this time I am not just re-committing myself to my blog, I am re-committing myself to my LIFE. It’s time to get focused; I mean REALLY laser focused on what it is I want to create for myself and take all action that moves me in that direction. No longer do I wish to keep playing the crapshoot. It’s time to get ‘er done! Five more months to go…the countdown is on. And I do believe that these next five months are going to be the best most exciting times to come yet.

Hold onto your hats folks, we’re going for a ride!

Day 209: My Hiatus

It has been EXACTLY one month since I last wrote. I feel like I owe you an apology. Well actually, I owe us both one.

I know some of you have been wondering if I was ok, if I “fell off the wagon”, if I was going to return…or just what the heck happened. I assure you, I didn’t fall of the wagon - I am still single, I am still focused on improving my health bit by bit, and I am still committed to improving myself to be a more self-empowered woman. I guess you can say I was simply on “hiatus” or on a spiritual quest if you will…a return to myself and a return to truth.

The details of how I got here are long, so I will spare you for fear that you would end up like my massage clients…snoring. Instead I will keep it simple and say that I would like to re-commit myself to you, to me, and to this blog. Yes, that means I am back in the game. Thank you for bearing with me this far, I look forward to the next five months and what journey lies ahead!

Day 178: The Vipassana Experience – Into The Deep

As you know, I have been having progressively worse nightmares each night while on this trip. Each day and each night another layer of my “onion” has been peeled away. Deeper and deeper down the rabbit hole I go.

Before I continue sharing though, I want to premise the remainder of this post with this…not everyone’s experience will be like mine. Every life is different and so too will be the experiences within it. So if you are scared of going to the retreat after I tell you all of what I went through, don’t be. You won’t have the same experiences. Just go with an open mind. You will surely find the rainbow at the end of the storm…if indeed you actually encounter one. It just happened to be that I did, and this is what it looked like.

It was on the seventh day that I went into the deep dark abyss of the underlying everything. After my latest nightmare I woke up crying, visibly shaken and wanting out of whatever the hell I got myself into. I was scared and oddly enough felt alone amongst people. My nightmares were no longer just nightmares; they became vivid memories of my past. It was in the night that I got to know the deepness of the dark within, and met face to face with my painful past…sexual abuse as a kid and rape at 18. Momentarily reliving it frightened me; however, if Vipassana got me here, surely it would also walk me out.

What I didn’t realize was that the simple act of breathing and getting in touch with the sensations of my own body would create such an enormous impact on me, but it did. It makes total sense too. I have been out of touch with it since I was about five. So getting back in touch with it and learning to bring myself back to the present moment, the here and now, was actually a big deal. Up until this point I have led an escapist’s life in a world of daydreams, fantasy and out of body experiences…all forms of disconnection with reality and what is actually occurring in the moment; also known as not being present. While it served its purpose in times when I needed it most to temporarily disconnect from what was going on, what I didn’t realize was that I never stopped doing it. Even with the threat removed, my former “escape” eventually became habitual and a hindrance. I was a prisoner of my own mind and in constant flight mode from anything that could possibly be deemed a threat. I was on auto-pilot, without even knowing why I was doing what I was doing. It reminds of the saying, “It’s not the devil you know, it’s the devil you don’t”.

And the learning didn’t stop there. The process also uncovered one of my relationship patterns of why I keep getting involved with the same characters I do…often ones who hurt or take advantage of me. Sound familiar? If you didn’t catch it, it is a repeat pattern of the first occurrence. Like a broken record, I have been stuck on “repeat” ever since.

But you know what? Awareness is the first step to change, and for that I am grateful. Now that I know what I know, it no longer has to be this way. I no longer have to be an unconscious slave to my own mind, creating my own misery. I can simply walk out. That’s it.

No doubt about it, Day 7 was definitely the hardest and most unpleasant of my days at the retreat, but it also possessed my greatest gifts within. And true to the essence of Vipassana and what I learned there, I am living the lessons of impermanence. Change is inevitable, and already my life has taken on a whole new direction.

If you choose, yours can too.

Day 177: The Vipassana Experience – Craving vs. Aversion…The Root Of Our Misery

Yesterday I wrote about the “Sitting of Strong Determination”; how to do it and what it was like, but I didn’t tell you the purpose of it. Yes, there actually is one. The exercise was more than just mind chatter and body pains; although I did come to the humble realization that my mind wanders like a five-year-old with ADD. I would meditate for maybe five minutes and then wander for twenty-five…on repeat. This mastery of the mind is tougher than it looks.

So what is the purpose?

Ultimately the final goal is enlightenment. However, Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither is the path to enlightenment. It requires time, patience, persistence…and baby steps. So for Days 5 and 6 we underwent an experiential learning about “craving” and “aversion” as it relates to the body, which in theory would automatically translate to the real world experiences because you would now possess the tool set. Reminds me of what one of my teachers past told me, “Nicole, how you do one thing is how you do everything.” Wise teacher.

So what is this “craving” and “aversion” that I speak of? Simple. Basically every outside stimulus we encounter creates one of two feelings; either we want more of it or we want less of it depending on how it makes us feel. This is where our misery starts; we let our outside world influence our inside world. So for our Vipassana experience we do it backwards and we concentrate on the only thing we can control…ourselves. We focused on our inside world, noticing each and every physical sensation in and on our body (whether that be hot, cold, tingles, pain, etc.), and our exercise was to neither judge these sensations as either good or bad, pleasurable or painful.  Our job was to simply observe; to notice, to understand that nothing, no moment in time, no feeling, no sensation, no stimulus lasts. Everything changes from moment to moment.

So as I sat there in meditation pose I did exactly this. I felt every part of my being, part by part, piece by piece. Sometimes I noticed the pain in my knees and watched it come and go rather than wish it to go away; and other times I felt the euphoric pressure of tingling energy build up in my body and simply observed it with a curious mind rather than wish and hope for more or for it to stay. Both became equal to me, none better than the other…it just was. And when you come to the point of being with the “just is” a wash of peace seems to find you there. Misery can no longer be where judgment is not, and melts away with each passing breath.

But let’s get real about it for a minute, the process of enlightenment isn’t an overnight process and it is not about to happen in a mere 10 days. It takes time. I mean if you think about it, it took me 31 years to get to where I am at…so there is a lot of unraveling to do. To get to the end goal requires patience and persistence. And this path requires a lot of silent observation. Just simply watch. Do nothing…not judge, not label, not make it good, bad, right or wrong…just observe whatever it is as it comes and as it goes.

Remember, at the end of the day, there is no permanence to anything. Even the solid rock is weathered by the wind and the seas. Which means “this too shall pass”…and so too will our misery if we but choose.

Update

In case you are all wondering...yes I am still alive. A lot has been happening since my return from the Vipassana retreat and I am just trying to keep up with it. Writing about my experience has also proved to be more difficult than I expected. Have no fear though, I am still here. I actually have been writing posts and saving them, but am trying to finish and post the Vipassana ones first...which means in the near future you will probably see double-posts just for me to get you caught up.

And to my reader who wrote me to see if I was ok...thank you. Your kindness and concern is appreciated. It feels good to know that I am so loved.

Hope you are all enjoying this beautiful summer sunshine while it is here...and I look forward to connecting with you here in the next couple of days. Tonight if I can swing it.   :o)

Day 176: The Vipassana Experience – The Initiation

The experience continues. Enter sleepless nights and nightmares stage right.

I tell you, when I thought Days 1-3 were hard it was because I hadn’t yet met the wrath of Day 4… Initiation Day. Ok, so perhaps “wrath” makes it sound worse than it was, but it was very difficult nonetheless. Up until Day 4, everything was just a prelude, the preparation for the real deal…the REAL work. All of a sudden the breathing exercises looked like a walk in the park.

On the fourth day we learned what the Vipassana meditation REALLY was. The technique was a rather painful experience of sitting still for not just one hour but TWO. It meant we were to keep our focus and not to bat an eyelash or move a muscle, pain or no pain…for two full hours. Yes, I just said TWO hours…all the while bringing our attention to each and every single body part and to take note of every subtle sensation there. We were essential getting to know ourselves inside and out…literally. It was called the “Sitting of Strong Determination” and is/was the gateway to our freedom from misery.

Personally, I thought I would die. But it wasn’t the sitting and not moving part that was the most painful part, it was the having to sit through the instructions in Thai…which took TWICE as long to explain as it did in English. Don’t get me wrong, I like the Thai and their food. Their noodles are great, but when it comes to meditation, the guy giving instructions was as slow as molasses when saying them and it drove me nuts for all 10 days.

So why am I doing this and what is the point of this specific meditation? Stick around for tomorrow’s post to find out!

Day 175: Do You Know What Day It Is?

Happy National Sister’s Day! My lil’ sister made sure that I wouldn’t forget today. LOL

If there is one thing that I highly value and love to bits and pieces, it is my family. No matter how rough and tough along the way; good, bad or ugly…they are still there at the end of the day. We see each other as we are, and we all love each other ANYWAY.

(It also helps that I am thousands of miles away though…they seem to appreciate and miss me more. HA!)

All joking aside, my sister is pretty special to me. So today I just wanted to pay a quick tribute to my beautiful babygirl who means the world to me and is a big part of my life. She’s pretty fantastic, and I love her. Alana my lovely, this post is for you...Happy Sister's Day! I am lucky to have you in my life.

And remember...

...I will love you until the ocean wears rubber pants

to keep its bottom dry.

A Sister’s Love

A sister’s love is special
in oh so many ways
Now miles stretch between us
and minutes turn to days.

We’ve shared so much as children
the tears, the joys, the pain
A lifetime spent together
those memories remain.

In times gone by we’ve pondered
the paths our lives have taken
Knowing that in spite of this
our sister love unshaken.

A sister’s love is special
in ways that are unspoken
Still that binding force exists
our sister love unbroken.

~ by Cute Fairy (http://www.poemsjunction.com/poems/sister-poems/)

Day 174: The Vipassana Experience – My “AH HA” Moment

It happened on Day 3. The light bulb went on. Well actually, it was one of many AH HA moments, but this one was THE big one that set the stage for the rest of my course there.

In the afternoon of the third day I found myself to be rather unsettled, so I went out for a walk along one of the many paths through the field of daisies and wild grasses and stopped to sit awhile on an old bench near a tree, and looked out to the snow covered mountain through a clearing in the distance. It was there that I asked God/Universe…whatever you want to call it… “What do you want from me?”

I questioned why I was there, what was this all about, what am I doing this for, and what am I here to learn. I trusted all the signs that brought me here…now what? Where do I go from here?

I sat there in silence awhile as emotions came and went…and then it hit me. What has been my major focus lately? My blog. Attracting Mr.Right. Relationships. Love. When I really looked at the big picture, my WHOLE LIFE has been focused around love. It is also the one thing that has brought me much misery over the years ever since I can remember. Interesting.

With this new insight and “Ah Ha!” moment, I felt more at peace. At least I have something from which to work from. Little did I know that this merely scratched the surface but at least I had something. And on my walk back to my room I found a small reminder of my purpose here in the form of a rock…a heart-shaped rock. I put it in my pocket and kept it there for the reminder of my stay, so that each time I found it I would remember. It was one of many that I found but I stopped collecting after five. I was thinking:

1.       Five is the perfect size of family

2.       If I collect any more rocks I am going to have a suitcase full of them that I would have to explain it to border security

But it didn’t stop there. I found heart-shapes everywhere. I found it in the clover leaves, I found it inscribed on the benches, I found it in the dry spots of the gravel after a rain, and I even found it in the defect on the polished floor where I meditated. I certainly didn’t look for it; it just happened that every time I looked down, everywhere I looked, I was reminded of love. My journey, my purpose here, was about love.

Just not what I thought it meant though. Stay tuned…

Day 173: The Vipassana Experience – Just Breathe

Now that I have set the stage for my Vipassana experience in my previous posts, you may now be wondering…how does it work? Well, it is super simple, but incredibly challenging. Over the next few posts I will be sharing the process I went through, day by day. Surprisingly a lot can happen in just a day, so today I will start with Days 1-2.

Breathe.

Yes, that’s what we learned. We learned how to breathe. Well actually, we learned how to focus our attention on our breath. Sounds so simple right? One would think that it would be such an easy task as breathing is something we do whether we consciously think about it or not…but it is actually quite difficult. Try it for five minutes. See if you can focus your mind on your breath. If you can focus on breathing and only breathing and NOTHING else for five minutes, I am impressed. I would say that I might have lasted about 30seconds, but the moment I think about time, I have already broken the focus. I learned in those first 30seconds that my mind has the attention span of a gnat. My mind wandered aimlessly like a monkey, running wild like a horse, and about as annoying as a kid hopped up on Red Bull in the backseat saying “Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?” For someone who has never meditated before, that first hour felt like an eternity.

Can anyone else relate to this?

This is what I was going through for three days. Add to that trying to find a comfortable meditation position to sit in that wouldn’t cause so much pain to my neck, back and knees, and I looked much like a squirmy worm. Thankfully I wasn’t the only one doing this though, so I didn’t feel so bad. But I got curious and figured there HAD to be another way to sit more comfortably than the stereotypical cross-legged position that we all most often see in those Zen meditation pictures…and there was. Did you know there are wee benches made just for meditation? It is like a small seat for your butt to sit on while kneeling on your knees. I figured it would be more painful for the knees, but not so…and much more ergonomically correct for your spine which means there is no neck or back problems either. So if you are going to this retreat, make sure you use one of these with lots of support cushions…unless you are a sucker for punishment, then all the power to you. But, trust me, when you get to Day 4 of the Vipassana you will be THANKING me.

Trust me.

Day 172: The Vipassana Experience - Heaven On Earth, Hippies & Mr. Dressup’s Tickle-Trunk

I should have known that the Vipassana retreat was going to be a BIG thing for me. From the point of conception of the idea, and the three separate major conversations I had with three perfect strangers beforehand – 4 months before I left, 4 days before I left, and 4 hours before I arrived there… the Universe was certainly conspiring with me to make sure that I got there to receive what was coming my way. Not too sure what the numbers mean, but there seemed to be a lot of patterned events happening.  The signs were clear and mountains definitely moved. I guess both the timing was right and I was ready for it. I just didn’t know what was coming.

I arrived at the retreat near Onalaska, Washington both excited and nervous. It was my 31^st birthday and I was told I was heading into a life-transforming experience. When I seen the participants there however, I felt like I was walking down Commercial Drive back in Vancouver as I seemed to be surrounded by a lot of bra-less hippies and hairy legs that would make a sasquatch blush. Some, I swear, must have raided Mr. Dressup’s tickle-trunk. I was certainly outnumbered, so as the saying goes “if you can’t beat them, join them!” And I did. For the 11 days I was there I went au-naturel. I didn’t wear makeup, I wore my hair naturally curly (yes, my hair is actually VERY curly), I got the closest I could to hippie clothes…yoga pants and a t-shirt, and I joined the bra-less revolution. In the words of William Wallace…”FREEDOM!”

LOL

Ok, well they weren’t all that way, just more than I am used to. I certainly felt the presence of the 60’s there - “free flow” and baked brownies certainly came to mind. Not typically my kind of crowd, but I was there for the experience not the people. Besides I am not supposed to judge anyway. When I was allowed to talk again at the end of it all though, I found these so-called “hippies” to be all super nice people.

The grounds we were on were absolutely stunning also. It was a retreat in the middle of nowhere with a backdrop of mountains, evergreens, and walking paths through a field of wildflowers and daisies. It was breathtakingly beautiful, peaceful and serene. And because it was so quiet, I got to see a little Bambi approach me within only two feet of me…twice, a baby squirrel…twice, and two eagles soaring in the skies overhead ….twice on my last two days there. The air was different there; it smelled sweet and fresh and clean, and I drank it in like wine. I was intoxicated by this magical place. It was heaven.

Stay tuned tomorrow for when I share how the meditation works and my first of many “Ah-HA” moment to be had there.

Day 171: I’m Floating!

I have never done drugs or been high before, but if I did, I am thinking this must be what it feels like. Three days back home and I still feel like I am totally Zen and blissed out. Perhaps the Vipassana people spiked my cookies, I am not sure. Whatever it is though, I like it. I literally feel like I am smiling from the inside out. I don’t even know how to explain the feeling I have. It is like I can feel the space between the space. Like my arm…it is as if there is air where my bones are…I feel really light. It’s a bit trippy and weird for me, but I am learning to like it.

And it’s not just me who notices either, other people have noticed that I am different too. They keep telling me that it is written all over my face and my eyes; like I have changed into a peaceful monk or something. I thought I was pretty chill before, but now…now I AM that. I hope this feeling lasts forever.

Ommmmm

Day 170: Vipassana…What Is It Anyway?

Alrighty folks. You have all been waiting so patiently for it, and now I am finally going to give you the goods. It may take a few blogs to fully explain my experience, but I will do my best to unfold it as it happened. So here it goes.

Before I begin though, I first want to give a special shout out to my friend Sean. If it weren’t for him and our chance meeting a few months ago, a truly a fantastic conversation with a near perfect stranger, I would never have gotten the gifts I now have from these past two weeks that I was away. Then again, I don’t really believe in accidents or chance either. I think when we are ready, we draw people or things to us and then magic starts to happen. Either way, I feel a deep gratitude within for the seed that was planted. So Sean, if you are reading this, thank you for leading me to the path of liberation.

Gosh, where do I even start? Perhaps at the beginning, or perhaps before I share my experiences I should first tell you what Vipassana IS and what it IS NOT so that you can have a clearer idea of what it was that I actually attended. It was far more than just the 10 days of no talking, no reading, no writing, and no communicating in any form as I had previously thought. That was the easy part. Bear with me though as I paraphrase my blue information pamphlet I received when I arrived - which by the way, was the ONLY reading material I had there, except for the labels and tags on bath mats and such. Yes, I actually read those…I was desperate. LOL

Vipassana happens to be one of India’s most ancient meditation techniques, and it literally means “to see things as they really are”. It is a purification process of the mind that leads to total liberation; a way to focus and set free the monkey mind that causes us so much misery when repeatedly thinking about our past or worrying about our future.

How? By the simple observation of our natural breath and body sensations. Sounds easy right? Hardly. Stick around and I will share with you the process I went through. Well worth the end result, but not exactly a walk in the park.

Day 169: New Beginnings & A Leap Of Faith

Today marks a pretty big day for me. It is exactly one year today that I decided to take a leap of faith and I got the keys to my massage studio so that I could begin renovations and start turning one of my dreams into a reality. Can you believe that it’s already been one year? I can’t. Where did the time go?

Now it’s time to do it again. Re-evaluate, renovate, improve and/or make new – a natural process of growth, and a new platform from which to grow some more. A parallel being experienced both personally and professionally. So for the next month I will be doing just that, and hope to take both me and my work to a whole new level and with greater direction. I am excited and will keep you posted.

Stay tuned tomorrow where I take you on my trippy Vipassana meditation journey. Oh, and what a trip it was! I am still feeling pretty float-y from it, and I swear there was no hippie brownies involved…unless the sweet little Thai ladies laced the cookies.

Hmmm…

Day 168: I'm Baaa-aaack!

Did you miss me? I missed you. I learned a lot over the past 12 days and I am excited to share with you all that happened at my silent meditative retreat. It was intense, yet intensely rewarding at the same time. I actually still feel like I am floating. Yes, even right now while typing, it is kind of weird. Now, for the next couple of days I will be reintegrating myself back into society which seems very…LOUD. Stay tuned for the next few blogs, there are things you won’t want to miss.

But you’ll have to wait until the 2^nd to hear about my experience there because tomorrow August 1^st marks a big day for me. Can you guess what it is?

Day 159: Vipassana Day 2

Since I am on a silent meditative retreat I thought it would be appropriate to observe the practice here for my blog too. So, for the next nine days I will be creating the space of silence on my blog, and will continue writing on July 31^st when I return. Yes, don’t worry, I will be coming back.


Wish me luck!

Day 158: Vipassana Day 1 - Ommmmm

Today is Day 1 of my silent retreat…shhhhhh. To give you an idea of what I will be going through for the next 10 days, this is what my timetable looks like:

4am                       Wake up

4:30-6:30              Meditate on own

6:30-8:00              Breakfast

8:00-9:00              Group Meditation

9:00-11:00           Meditate some more

11:00-noon         Lunch

Noon-1:00           Rest

1:00-2:30              Meditate on own

2:30-3:30              Group Meditation

3:30-5:00              Meditate some more

5:00-6:00              Tea break

6:00-7:00              Group Meditation

7:00-8:15              Teacher’s Discourse

8:15-9:00              Group Meditation

9:00-9:30              Question time (I can actually talk now)

9:30pm                 Bedtime, lights out

For someone who doesn’t meditate, that’s a whole LOT of meditating! Holy Cow.

Day 157: Go Shawty, It's Your Birthday!

I love birthdays. I especially love MY birthday. It’s the gathering of people that I love, a celebration of life, and typically one step closer wisdom. Plus you get birthday cake and ice cream…so you can’t really go wrong.

This birthday however, I chose to celebrate by going away for a while and getting to know myself on a deeper level that I have never known before. Personally, I think it is the greatest gift I could have ever given myself, and I have to thank my friend Sean for planting the seed four months ago.

I can’t help but feel like something super fantastic and great is about to happen for me though; although I am not sure what that may be. Due to the timing it sure feels like endings and beginnings…a time to reflect on where I have come from and where I am going. The dates I am gone are rather significant too. I leave for an opportunity to transform myself and my life ON my 31^st birthday; a fantastic way to set the stage for the coming year. I also return back to Vancouver on the day that I originally started my business one year ago.

 Funny how everything is coming full circle.

Day 156: If I Were A Super Hero…

My name would be Awesome, Captain Awesome. But you can call me Capt’n for short. And for no other reason than I feel pretty darn fantastic right now. That’s reason enough, right?

So why do I feel so good? Well, if I remember correctly, this is my first break from work and all forms of technology in over a year now. I can’t even cheat myself out of an actual day off this time either, like I usually do, because I am not allowed to read, write, email or phone anybody, at any time, for any reason. I guess I am learning what a work/life balance is; I swung so far one way in becoming a near workaholic, and now I am going to the opposite extreme and hoping to find myself land in the middle somewhere. Balance is what I am looking for. And you know what? It feels darn good. Why I haven’t done this sooner is beyond me. Oh well, live and learn.

One day…only one day left before I leave on a pretty deep inner journey into the unknown. Sounds kinda spooky eh?

Day 155: Forgiveness Is NOT What You Think It Is

“There is nothing in our past, no pain, no regret, no crime, nothing that cannot be forgiven. But you must ask. Start with yourself.”

That was the message I received in my inbox this morning as a daily meditation from a website I subscribe to, which was sent the day after my own blog post on forgiveness. How is that for divine timing eh? I will take that as a sign that I am in the flow and back on track again.

I know I am heading in the right direction though. I have known that I am meant to travel down this path for a while now; however I just wasn’t ready before. I needed more experiential life lessons I guess. But the evidence is clear. I have more and more people asking me about it, and to be honest, I think it would be rather selfish of me not to pass on what I have learned if it can help another person.

We teach what we need to learn most, and well…let’s just say that I am still learning. I have definitely had a lot to forgive. Not as you think though. Forgiveness rarely has anything to do with the other person.

Say what?

Yes, you heard me right. Think about it awhile until I get back from my silent retreat. I am sure we will have lots to talk about when I return.

Namaste my friends.

Day 154: Forgiveness is Freedom

Something most of you don’t know about me is that I am in training to become a Forgiveness Coach. Actually, that was my original business plan to start with. And although massage comes very natural for me and I absolutely LOVE doing it, I actually never meant to be a massage practitioner…that happened quite by accident and more out of necessity and survival.

It was forgiveness, not massage, which inspired me to want to be of service to others. It was forgiveness that originally brought me to you. However, due to several unforeseen circumstances, I had to postpone the work I was doing, and just now I find myself drawn back to it.

The past few days I have been immersing myself pretty heavily in the very thing that brought me to who I am today, and what I know I am meant to bring forth to others. In my humble opinion, I also think it is the one thing on this Earth that everyone could use, understand, and learn how to do, whether they consciously know it or not. It goes deeper and touches more aspects of our lives that one would think. The question is, are you ready for it? And how far down the rabbit hole would you like to go if it meant internal peace and happiness?

As you can see and will get to know about me in the coming months, forgiveness is something I am super passionate about. Why? Because I have a lot of experience with it, especially in things one would wonder how it was possible.

But it is not really about the “how”. Knowing “how” is only secondary to the most important question…”why”. Why would you want to forgive? And when you find your why, the how will present itself. My why was for freedom…and when I was ready, forgiveness found me. And from that, I found the kind of peace within that most people only dream of.

Hold on to your hats folks, I have a feeling things are going to get interesting from here on in.

Day 153: Going On A Silent Meditative Retreat…And I Don’t Even Meditate

Only four more days. Are you as nervous as I am? You should see all the funny looks I get when I mention that I am going away for two weeks on a silent meditative retreat. One of the funniest responses I got was, “So you can’t talk AT ALL? Not even a little?” Nope, not even a little. That would defeat the purpose of “silent retreat” wouldn’t it?

I will admit that I have been a bit nervous about it myself lately. I mean, forget the no talking rule for a moment…there is something far more serious at stake here. I don’t even meditate. Yes, that’s right I’m jumping right into the deep end; which means I will be sitting and meditating for ten hours a day. So in “Who Wants To Be A Millionaire” fashion, in order to gain more insight into the situation I chose to use a lifeline and I phoned a friend to walk me through the fear.

His advice? Do it one day at a time and be all in. If I want to make the most of it, don’t cheat; participate fully, follow the rules, and do everything. In other words, if I am going to do it, then DO IT. Which makes sense, right? I didn’t chose to take the time off work to do this half-assed, and only get half-assed results. What would be the point in that?

Day 152: Signs of Aging

What is this getting up at 6am thing? I thought only grandparents do that. But here I am, finding myself wide awake at the crack of dawn which is even before six. I have been like this for the past couple of weeks. Being a late riser, this is totally a new concept to me. Does this mean that I am officially getting old? What a weird thought. Thankfully my face hasn’t caught up with the number of my years; and even though my mind speaks as if I am older, I am still young at heart.

I am not scared of getting older though…just curious about it. I notice a few differences now; things that weren’t there before. White hair would be one of those things; thankfully I color my hair blonde so that it is less obvious. I remember bugging my mom as a kid about hers, and now I have them. I think mine is stress-related though. Come to think about it, she probably could too…she had kids. HA!

Perhaps randomly getting up at 6am is not necessarily a bad thing though. They say most successful people are early risers. If that is true, then maybe getting up with the sun isn’t such a bad idea after all. I mean, who doesn’t want to be successful? I guess if I want to roll with the big wigs, then I better learn to play like the big wigs.

Bring on the worms…this early bird is ready to rumble!

Day 151: I Feel Like I Am Dying

Don’t worry, I don’t mean a physical death. I do feel like a part of me is dying however...like I am going through a rite of passage or something. July 20^th marks the end of another birth year, another chapter in my life, and the departure from a way of being that once was and will no longer be when I return. Needless to say, this Vipassana retreat has got me feeling a little nervous. Only six days more days now. Gosh, how time flies.

Day 150: Are You Ready For It? Meet My Mr. Right.

You want to hear something funny? I almost always end up being attracted to someone I never initially liked nor was attracted to when I first met them. The ones that last I mean.

The attractor factor usually changes though when they do something unexpected that shows genuine care. Sometimes it’s even a helping hand when I need it or a hand on the shoulder in tough times…because it shows that they are dependable, reliable, and more importantly there for me. But surprisingly, it is not even about the task. People typically don’t remember what you do; they remember how they feel when you do it.

It’s true. People don’t care what you know until they know that you care, and I for one am like that in relationships. I take notice of actions and the little things. It is how they make me feel when I am around them, and when that happens they look like the shiniest gem on the earth; something I truly treasure. And when I am in…I am all in. For me it’s about personality, consideration of others, someone I count on to be there, and a genuine kindness. It is about the person and who they truly are. That’s what gets noticed. It really is about the little things.

Despite popular belief, it is not the big things but the little things that matter. It is the little things that add up, and when you pay attention to them the payoff is big. It’s about the dandelion you pick for me on our walk because I told you once that they remind me of the sun and I like them; not the fast ride you drive. It is about cooking with me in the kitchen and sharing the experience together; not the house we cook it in. It is about sharing with me your passion and yours dreams and the kind of day you’ve had at work; not the kind of job you have. Someone who understands that it is not even what you are doing; it is that you are doing it together.

And last, but certainly not least, when choosing my Mr. Right I am looking for someone who sees me like it’s the first time…every time. Someone who sees me as I am and tells me…"I've been waiting for a girl like you..."

Day 149: Oops!

Well that wasn’t supposed to happen. My “20 minute” power nap turned into a six hour of out-cold-dead-to-the-world and waking up thinking “Where am I?” kind of sleep. I don’t remember a thing. I have been cheating on my sleep for the past two days, and apparently my body is telling me enough is enough. Bodies know best. How foolish am I if I think I can outsmart it.

Anyway, a friend asked me a question today which I had intended on answering as part of today’s post.

“So you’re blogging about a finding a guy right? What are you looking for?” he queried.

To which I replied, “Well, it is actually really about personal development and growth, but good question. What am I looking for? A lot.”

But since it is well after midnight and I am still operating in fuzzy-brain mode, which means any attempt to tell you would be mixed with a delirium at this point, it is probably best that I write to you tomorrow and tell you. I don’t particularly enjoy head-bobble writing anymore; you know the kind where I write a bit, fall asleep at the computer, and then wake up in a jerk STILL at my computer wondering how long I have been out for. Then I write, read the same sentence I just wrote, forget what I read, rinse and repeat. And what should only take me about 20 minutes to write turns into two hours. It’s kind of like being drunk minus the booze, the hangover, or the empty wallet the next day. Anyone watching would laugh at me. Heck I would be laughing at me too. It’s kind of funny…and sad. HA!

So tomorrow it is. Which means, if you are interested in knowing what my Mr. Right looks like, stay tuned!

*cue twilight music*

Day 148: Adventure Is My Middle Name

Nine more days and counting…wait…I mean eight. Apparently I can’t count today. There’s a lot to do in not a whole lot of days. I have no idea where time goes. It feels like it just snuck up on me. I have been putting my nose to the ground these days though and plugging away at everything pretty hard to get things done. I will be gone for two weeks, and I would rather come back to orderliness than chaos if at all possible.

Ten days of pure quiet, stillness and meditation. Not a peep, not a whisper, not a “How do you do?” I must say I am a little bit nervous as I don’t really know what to expect. Heck, I don’t even meditate. HA! Talk about jumping in the deep end first. But that’s me. I like the mystery, I like the adventure, I like doing things I have never done before. I am an explorer; I always have been. And this is no ordinary trek. To be honest, if I don’t do it this way and just be open to whatever, I might not do it. Just like skydiving, cliff jumping, and owning my own business…if I had thought about it too long before jumping in I probably wouldn’t have done it. Some things are just better done on the fly.

I wonder, with ten days of sitting in silence with my eyes closed the whole time, do you think anyone would notice if I fell asleep for part of it? Would you rat me out? God knows I could sure use the rest.

Shhhhhh!   ;o)

Day 147: A Homeless Man, A Banana And A Humble Awakening

I learned a powerful lesson and the true gift of giving today. I can’t even begin to express how I feel right now. I have no words. Touched, moved and inspired are the closest I can come. Although you cannot see me, I have been literally moved to tears; overwhelmed with a sense of joy, happiness, and gratitude. And believe it or not, it all started with a homeless man. How so? Let me tell you.

When I moved to Vancouver, I had never seen a homeless man before. It was new, it was foreign to me…and it broke my heart. When I first came here I would pass by them on my way to school every day, and it made me sad to see how a country as well off as ours can’t even feed and shelter our own people when I know there is more than enough to go around. I just don’t understand it. There is something seriously wrong with our system.

Now I will be the first to admit that since arriving here, I have almost become desensitized to the whole situation; of which I am not proud. I moved here as a student and so hardly had two pennies to rub together, yet always felt guilty when having to say no to their requests for money because I truly wanted to help but I didn’t have the means to do it. However today was different…not sure why, but it was. Today I actually heard beyond their request, and instead of hearing “I need money”, I heard, “I am hungry”. And instead of saying “Sorry I can’t” I said, “All I have is a banana. Would you like a banana instead?”

And that’s all it took. My mind had switched from one of lack to one of abundance; focusing on what I DO have and what I CAN give rather than what I don’t have or can’t give. And you know what? I have never seen a more sincerely grateful man in my whole life. His face changed. For the first time I saw him his eyes told me everything I needed to know. It wasn’t even about the banana anymore; it was about compassion – love, tenderness and kindness towards another human being. And to be honest, between us two, I think I got the greater gift…a connection to my heart that money cannot buy.

It’s true what they say, “The gift is in the giving.”

Day 146: The Count Down is On…SERENITY NOW!

I am not sure if I told you already, but I finally got my acceptance letter to attend the Vipassana retreat down in Washington…the state, not the city. I am pretty sure I forgot to mention it, so now you now…and I leave in 10 days. That also means I will be busting my butt from now until then to get all my business stuff in order before I go.

Now for those of you who don’t know what a Vipassana is (and don’t worry, I didn’t before either), it is a ten day silent, meditative retreat. That means no talking. It also means no reading, no writing, no physical contact with anyone either…including hugs. Did I mention no talking? So sad. But there is a rhyme and reason for it all I am sure. At least that is what I am told.

This Vipassana retreat came highly recommended by a couple of my guy friends, who have also been through it and rave about it. Apparently you come back transformed. As long as I don’t come back as a goat I am happy. Kidding. (Double pun…LOL!)

Seriously though, from what I gather it is about letting go of the monkey-mind and finding some peace in the silence of what is. It’s about surrendering.

SERENITY NOW!

...insanity later.

Day 145: From Social Butterfly to Social Media

I used to be a bit of a social butterfly back in my day. A little more recent than your grandfathers “uphill both ways barefoot through ten feet of snow days”, but far enough back that I can still say “back in the day”. You know the days when being a social butterfly meant you actually talked to people, you meet and greet and get to know them…in person. Sounds pretty crazy, I know, but people actually did that once upon a time.

But times have changed and so have we. Our focus has shifted from social butterfly to social media. If you are not sure what that means, you are reading one form of it…blogs, FaceBook, Twitter, LinkedIn, etc. It’s a not-so-new-anymore form of communication that has spread like wildfire, and if you’re not on the bandwagon, you’ll get left behind in the smoke. So as much as I used to resist it, the saying still rings true…”if you can’t beat them, join them.” So I joined them.

As I shared yesterday, communication is absolutely essential when it comes to building and fostering solid relationships; business relationships are no exception. And as a blogger, I figured that learning how best to communicate my thoughts and then engage with others would probably be a good idea. So I took a suggestion from Dale Carnegie and sought out someone who knew waaay more than I do on the subject. His name is Owen Clark.

Now Owen, in my eyes, is a pretty brilliant man. He is a dreamer, he is a doer, he is passionate about everything he does, he constantly seeks to learn and grow himself as well as help others, he is a master networker, a business owner since he was a teen, and at the heart of it all an entrepreneur through and through. He is an all-around good guy, and is very much like me… except older and a little farther down entrepreneurial the road. To make a long story short, Owen is Mr. Social Media and he practices what he preaches. So when I had the opportunity to learn from him and emulate what he does in the business realm, I jumped on board. Twice.

I took Owen’s in-class course called “Social Media in 30min A Day” about a month ago now, and it has radically changed how I relate to others in the online realm and has helped me do business.  AND when I actually implemented the easy to learn steps I got results, and I got them relatively fast. It is really not rocket-science, but it sure helped to have someone guide me through something I never really understood before. And now, because of him, not only can I connect with you (my readers) better, but I also don’t have to fumble around and waste precious time trying to figure it all out by myself. No need to pave a new road when there is already one there.

So if you are like me and need some help in the social media realm, whether to manage it, spend less time on it, know what to post and when, create content, etc., I would highly recommend Owen’s course and let him help you get connected. Lucky for you, you no longer have to drive anywhere as it is now available online. How is that for cool? If you are curious and want to know more, check out this video:

And then head to http://socialmediabyowen.com for more information about the social media course, about Owen, and his 120-day risk free guarantee. Absolutely NOTHING to lose…you can’t really get better than that.

Trust me, if you are a business owner, it is sooooo worth it.

…and hey, if nothing, at least you’ll have a lot more new people to StalkBook. HAHA! Kidding of course. Don’t do that…or at least don’t get caught. ;o)