Day 8: First step to Attracting Mr. Right…Stop Looking

You know what I love? Writing. I love writing like I love doing massage. Neither of which I even knew I liked before or even thought I was good at, and both stumbled upon by sheer accident when I was focusing on something else. It happened when I wasn’t looking. I believe Mr. Right will happen much the same way. When I’m not looking, and when I least expect it. BAM! WHOOP THERE IT IS! But for humor’s sake, let me share with you some of my “before” picture dating scene when I WAS actively looking. Hold onto your hats folks, it may blow you away.

So up until recently, I’ve spent a LOT of time LOOKING for “the One”. They say success is on the other side of failure, and sometimes you go through a lot of Mr. Wrong’s to get to Mr. Right. The thing about me is, I don’t give up easily and I refuse to quit. Learn what you can, from who you can, and move forward. My quest for love started on the playground, graduated to the notorious bar scene, travelled far and wide, sailed the seas, then back home to try the online thing. The stories I could tell you would probably make your eyes pop. Stupid funny and ridiculous mostly…and THOSE ones are mostly since I moved here to Vancouver. Funny that. The best of these stories though come from a well-known local dating site called POF…or as my girlfriends say Plenty of Freaks. To date here are my top six all time dating disaster favorites:

1.       The crazy foot fetish porn website guy

2.       The schizophrenic

3.       The Dr. Jekyll /Mr. Hyde - a total bong show. No, that’s not a typo

4.       The severely superstitious thought-I-did-voodoo guy (Umm…really?!? Wow. I’m about as harmless as a baby lamb, and if I DID have that sort of power I’d probably put it to productive use and try to score the lottery instead. Seriously. I laughed for DAYS.)

5.        The guy who recently made it on the late night news…police report

6.       …and finally, let’s not forget the guy who asked me if I’d sleep with a random dude for a million bucks. I said “No, I’m not for sale thanks”. He said, “Really? For a million bucks? I would sleep with him!” “How about that one then?” pointing to another dude. He was dead serious. To this I say, “Cheque please!”

The list is actually longer, but you get the point. Needless to say, that although the online scene certainly provided some interesting entertainment, I am no longer fishing. Actually, I think it’s best if I don’t look at all. I think it’s best if I focus on something else for a change - ME...and things I’m passionate about.  I wouldn’t be surprised that by doing what I love every day that it will just happen, naturally, without looking. Besides I’d rather stumble upon him by accident…like at a grocery store or something. When I tell my family this they laugh. I get comments like, “Where, the ‘Meat Market’…in the pepperoni and sausage aisle?” Ha…very funny guys. No. For some reason, I’ve always pictured meeting Mr. Right at the grocery store, in the dairy aisle, laughing over spilled milk. Sounds silly, I know. It would also be a bit tricky as I’m rarely there, and I very rarely drink milk. Ah well, one can dream!

Having said that, how much do you want to bet that someone’s going to follow me around with a litre of milk in their hands now? You know as well as I do that SOMEONE is going to do it. LOL

(And yes, just for the record, my family IS like that. Where do you think I get MY humor from?)