Day 31: How Honest Are You...With You?

I had a rather interesting conversation with a good friend about “honesty” today. It got me thinking - how honest are we? I mean, if we were TRULY honest in relationships, with others and with ourselves, would there be as much suffering? I doubt it. So why aren’t we?

Seeing as I can only speak for myself, I will use myself as an example.

I actually consider myself to be a very honest person, and so do those who know me. Ask me anything and I will tell you. And when it comes to relationships I am no different, I am dead honest. I have done the runaround enough times to know better. There are other areas in my life however, that I had and have to take a serious look at and get real with. Didn’t even know I was deceiving myself, but the consequences were and are evident. I will tell you about that on another day though.

So today, considering that my blog theme is about “Attracting Mr. Right”, I would like to talk about honesty within relationships instead. Ask yourself this…Have you ever been in a relationship that you knew in your heart that it wasn’t “it”, yet created reasons to stay anyway? Compromised your own values or tried to fit into someone else’s mould or ideal to be liked? Settle for less? Or how about staying, hoping for “them” to change?

Hate to say it, but it’s all lies…and of the worst kind too. Lying to yourself, creating your own misery. Doing any of the above is like trying to fit a square peg in a round hole. It just doesn’t work, and will only create friction, aggravation, and cause pain. I know this because I have done them all, many times over, and over…and over. Lesson continued until a lesson learned I have been told, and let me tell you…I have certainly learned. I even have the “wisdom hairs” to prove it!

Thankfully though, I finally “got it”. It had been a long learning process of self-evaluation and seeking truth. I figured out the relationship thing a little while ago already, which is why I am not interested in settling for anything less than what I already know I deserve. I had to get REALLY honest with myself on what I wanted and what I was doing however, and I now no longer fall into the same fear traps I once did. Letting go of the fear is quite liberating actually, and is also the major motivating factor on me being single for the next 334 days – I am definitely ok with taking my sweet time to choose more wisely. Honestly, I am in absolutely no rush. Mr. Right can wait.